Conversing with a Genius

They say it takes a lot of courage to muster up the courage to talk to a genius. I’ll leave you to decide who is who here.

Also do visit this ‘genius’s’ blog. HERE.

(I love these conversations, sometimes when i’m sad or upset, i go back and read them and life doesnt seem that bad.)

Ashwin: poopy!’
Me: I need a job 😦
Ashwin: Me too
I want to go home
and I want to break free
Me: Freddie Mercury did that. But he was gay.
I think you can if you want to
Just believe in yourself.
Ashwin: sniff
boo hoo
sniff sniff
wah
If I was a baby I could just poop in my pants right now and people would find it adorable
instead I have to hold it in until it feels like my asshole is going to volcanically explode
everyone should be babies
Me: Or wear pampers and make it seem normal.
Ashwin: that’s just disgusting
I want to be a baby
Me: You can’t.
Ashwin: Why not?
I obviously have magic Benjamin Button powers
Me: What? Since when?
Ashwin: Since……….. BWEEEOOOOP now!
Me: I call your bluff!
Ashwin: I’m  7 years old right now
now I’m 4  years old
Me: How can you type? Also are you time travelling? I’d like some Michael Jackson molestation then, on your way back.
Ashwin: Benjamin Button did not time travl
He aged in reverse
I’m 1 year old right now btw
Me: Prove it.
Ashwin: goo goo daa daa
Me: die die die die
Ashwin: you want a 1 year old baby to die?
Me: Yes, please
Ashwin: that’s so incredibly cruel
I’m calling the cops
your ass is going to jail!
I can’t figure this chick out
Me: Which one? The cop chick?
Jail chick?
Chick chick?
Ashwin: chick chick
Me: Where?
Ashwin: *Where do you think?*
Me: pajama wali?
Ashwin: yes
poop
Me: nooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Ashwin: do I post anything now or just wait
Me: What was her last post?
Ashwin: essetially *hey, what’s up, hows it going*
Me: Aww. I say you call her up and propose sex.
Ashwin: “Hey, let’s fuck.” like that?
or should I just call and breathe heavily and then she’ll get the message?
Me: The 2nd option. Sexier.
Ashwin: Also doesn’t at all make me come off as a potential rapist
Me: No, definitely not. I mean if she thinks that way of you, then this isnt the one for you. Small minded and all that.
Ashwin: you’re right
every woman I date has to love rape or how will she get used to what I will eventually do to any pets she has?
Me: Or her, for that matter.
Ashwin: or to her BUTT!!! AMIRITE?!?!?!? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! HI-FIVE!!!
Me: Loser.
Ashwin: 😥
Me: CRY!
CRY YOU BITCH CRY!
Ashwin: MAKE MY FRIEND A SAMMICH!!
😥
Me: NO
Ashwin: make it out of dog poop
Me: YES
Ashwin: SAMMICH!
Me: NO
Ashwin: where’s my sandwich?
Me: In my dog’s ass. Should be done in a couple of hours.

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