I still havent found me

I’m just a girl with a heart. I love happy thoughts and happy people. I’m not shiny and I don’t have it in me to be that person. But for me happiness is infectious.

I thrive on love and being loved. I thrive on having a close-knit group that hears my soul reach out to them.

I want to help… Even if I’m at the deepest end, floundering, you can be sure I’ll rush to save you. I want to help. It sets my heart at peace. I don’t have money, I’m not rich, I don’t save and I’m not successful, yet. But I can love and I can care better than anyone you know.

I fall in love easily and get hurt just as easily. I am weak. I am human… human where if you make me lose something I love, I will take you down. I don’t forgive easy; sometimes I don’t forgive at all. I don’t give second chances.

If I do forgive, I’ll never forget. I’m imperfect. I’m working on it. If I’m in your life romantically, I want to be enough for you. I want to be it all. I want to be right. For you.

I have trust issues. I’ve always had trust issues. I’m insecure in relationships. I feel that you may think another woman is better than me and leave me. I will never feel good enough unless you make the effort in changing the way I think.

I take awhile to call you a friend but if I do, we’ll be friends for a lifetime and no matter how many times you may hurt me, I’ll come back. I’ll be there when you need me to but I wont trust you.

There are very few people I despise or hate. This usually happens when you’ve gone out of your way to be mean or hurt people I love. They are ugly emotions but I possess them. I’m not perfect.

I still haven’t found what I’m looking for. I still haven’t found anyone who is willing to take the time to get to know me, I still haven’t found anyone capable of loving me with the amount of love I have for them.

I still haven’t found me.

Your imperfections make you perfect.

 

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2 thoughts on “I still havent found me

  1. hello.. this is an another awesome post. I actually am in love with the way you put the words so beautifully 🙂 they portray a crystal clear picture of wat I or many others go thru..tho i know they are your own thoughts..! Superb person you are..in my eyes 🙂

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